Control the Irrational Beliefs, Revel in the Rational
Let's be honest with ourselves.
Generally we all get miserable with our lives sometimes, and it's usually because one of two things seems to be happening to us: either we're doing something that we don't want to be doing, or we have a lingering feeling we can't shake.
And while we're being honest, let's say this: it's probably our own fault that one of those two things is taking place, no matter how much it feels like the universe is conspiring against us.
No, I am not just piling on at this point to your existing misery.
What experts will tell you is that your own irrational beliefs lead to negative thoughts that create a change reaction, leading to a bad event taking place in your life.
How does this irrational belief chain reaction happen? Emotions follow those thoughts, and those emotions guide our behaviors.
In other words, what we believe is going to happen in the world around us--through this chain of events--can actually cause that very same thing to occur.
So we need to change our irrational beliefs to change what is happening around us.
Now, not all of our beliefs need to be changed.
Some of our beliefs might be called rational beliefs.
Those are good ones that we can get to later.
Irrational beliefs, on the other hand, are what cause us emotional disturbances, which can then lead to negative behaviors that bring about the very results we thought we're trying to avoid.
(But we don't need to go over that whole cycle of cause and effect, do we?) Four irrational beliefs cause most if not all of the emotional distress that you and I can face.
Those four irrational beliefs are demandingness, neediness, human worthiness, and low frustration tolerance.
These four irrational beliefs can show up in our lives as you clinging to your partner so much until you actually chase them away.
Or you could treat your co-workers like your personal slaves so you don't have to earn their approval in positive ways.
The key point to remember about irrational beliefs and emotions is that they are not based in reality and the events occurring around you.
Irrational beliefs are based in your reactions to those events.
Those good rational beliefs we mentioned earlier are the opposite.
Those are your reactions to events when they are based in reality--to events on the ground, in the parlance of the military.
Rational beliefs are about the glass being half full or half empty--it's about seeing the glass as it really is.
That means accepting yourself and others for how they are, enjoying the good things in life but being able to weather the bad things.
Rational beliefs lead to emotions that are manageable, which lead to behaviors that are healthy and productive.
So rational beliefs lead to actions with positive results, ultimately helping you on your way to achieving goals and dreams.
That's far from what you get with irrational beliefs.
Generally we all get miserable with our lives sometimes, and it's usually because one of two things seems to be happening to us: either we're doing something that we don't want to be doing, or we have a lingering feeling we can't shake.
And while we're being honest, let's say this: it's probably our own fault that one of those two things is taking place, no matter how much it feels like the universe is conspiring against us.
No, I am not just piling on at this point to your existing misery.
What experts will tell you is that your own irrational beliefs lead to negative thoughts that create a change reaction, leading to a bad event taking place in your life.
How does this irrational belief chain reaction happen? Emotions follow those thoughts, and those emotions guide our behaviors.
In other words, what we believe is going to happen in the world around us--through this chain of events--can actually cause that very same thing to occur.
So we need to change our irrational beliefs to change what is happening around us.
Now, not all of our beliefs need to be changed.
Some of our beliefs might be called rational beliefs.
Those are good ones that we can get to later.
Irrational beliefs, on the other hand, are what cause us emotional disturbances, which can then lead to negative behaviors that bring about the very results we thought we're trying to avoid.
(But we don't need to go over that whole cycle of cause and effect, do we?) Four irrational beliefs cause most if not all of the emotional distress that you and I can face.
Those four irrational beliefs are demandingness, neediness, human worthiness, and low frustration tolerance.
These four irrational beliefs can show up in our lives as you clinging to your partner so much until you actually chase them away.
Or you could treat your co-workers like your personal slaves so you don't have to earn their approval in positive ways.
The key point to remember about irrational beliefs and emotions is that they are not based in reality and the events occurring around you.
Irrational beliefs are based in your reactions to those events.
Those good rational beliefs we mentioned earlier are the opposite.
Those are your reactions to events when they are based in reality--to events on the ground, in the parlance of the military.
Rational beliefs are about the glass being half full or half empty--it's about seeing the glass as it really is.
That means accepting yourself and others for how they are, enjoying the good things in life but being able to weather the bad things.
Rational beliefs lead to emotions that are manageable, which lead to behaviors that are healthy and productive.
So rational beliefs lead to actions with positive results, ultimately helping you on your way to achieving goals and dreams.
That's far from what you get with irrational beliefs.
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