How to Discuss Sexual Problems With Your Spouse

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If you are having sexual problems, you need to talk about them.
Sexual problems are not as uncommon as you may think. Rather, they are just not discussed very often. This means that it is easy to assume that you are alone in having sexual difficulty. This problem is compounded if you don't talk about your sexual problems with your spouse; it becomes an elephant in the room and a solution becomes even harder to reach. So, if you are having recurring sexual problems you need to have a frank, open discussion about them to effectively address them and keep your marriage going.
Difficulty:

Instructions
1.
o 1
Talk about sex routinely, whether you are having problems or not. This makes the subject less taboo and it keeps problems from surfacing as easily. If you are open and honest about sex, then you will find it easier to be open and honest about sexual problems.
o 2
Talk about sex during a non-sexual time. If you've just tried to have sex and it didn't work out, tell your spouse you'll talk about it another time. Failed sex can make people feel very insecure and emotional, which means that this is not a good time to talk about it.
o 3
Choose a time when neither of you have any pressing obligations. You should not feel rushed during your discussion about sex, but rather should have all the time you need to think about, process and generally come to terms with your issues.
o 4
Be honest. It can be tempting to try to spare your spouse's feelings by lying or omitting truths, but this does more harm than good. Rather, you should say exactly how you feel and what you think.
o 5
Avoid insults and direct attacks. Try to phrase things in terms of how you feel rather than what your partner does, because this will keep him from feeling inadequate.
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