Marriage - To Be or Not To Be
As a Life Coach I speak with many women and I am noticing an overwhelming pattern regarding the topic of marriage, so I would like to offer some "food for thought.
" History tells us that for most of Western history, marriage was a private contract between two families.
Until the 16th-century, Christian churches accepted the validity of a marriage on the basis of a couple's declarations.
If two people claimed that they had exchanged marital vows-even without witnesses-the Catholic Church accepted that they were validly married.
In lieu of the fact that a "piece of paper" or marriage certificate in fact, really doesn't constitute "marriage", let's imagine that perhaps marriage is a thing of the heart, or in other words, should come from the heart center, and not be driven by age and social standing.
To validate that marriage has not come from the heart center, let's review the statistics.
About 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States end in divorce.
The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher.
Marriage is a "learned behavior and learned belief system.
" It appears that just as we are conditioned to go to school by a certain age, we are also conditioned to be married, by a certain age, with children.
This conditioning is social.
Spoken and unspoken.
The problem with this conditioning is that there is not a support system in place for those who do not find themselves married, with children.
Therefore, the woman is left feeling alone, ashamed of her "unmarried" social status, and feeling as if she has either done something wrong, or is some kind of outcast.
I have taught my own daughter that the most important person in her life is her; To think her own thoughts and question those things that may not be right for her.
I seek to bring to light anything which may cause a person to devalue themselves in the face of a belief system, tradition, or learned behavior process.
It is because of those things that have been spoon-fed to us since we were born; Those things that we may not have had the opportunity to even question, that can cause harm as we try to live up to the expectations that we place upon ourselves, and the expectation that others place upon us.
What do YOU believe? What do YOU think? What do YOU know for sure as YOUR truth? Whatever it is, it is right for YOU.
Welcome to the Path of Self Awareness.
" History tells us that for most of Western history, marriage was a private contract between two families.
Until the 16th-century, Christian churches accepted the validity of a marriage on the basis of a couple's declarations.
If two people claimed that they had exchanged marital vows-even without witnesses-the Catholic Church accepted that they were validly married.
In lieu of the fact that a "piece of paper" or marriage certificate in fact, really doesn't constitute "marriage", let's imagine that perhaps marriage is a thing of the heart, or in other words, should come from the heart center, and not be driven by age and social standing.
To validate that marriage has not come from the heart center, let's review the statistics.
About 40 to 50 percent of married couples in the United States end in divorce.
The divorce rate for subsequent marriages is even higher.
Marriage is a "learned behavior and learned belief system.
" It appears that just as we are conditioned to go to school by a certain age, we are also conditioned to be married, by a certain age, with children.
This conditioning is social.
Spoken and unspoken.
The problem with this conditioning is that there is not a support system in place for those who do not find themselves married, with children.
Therefore, the woman is left feeling alone, ashamed of her "unmarried" social status, and feeling as if she has either done something wrong, or is some kind of outcast.
I have taught my own daughter that the most important person in her life is her; To think her own thoughts and question those things that may not be right for her.
I seek to bring to light anything which may cause a person to devalue themselves in the face of a belief system, tradition, or learned behavior process.
It is because of those things that have been spoon-fed to us since we were born; Those things that we may not have had the opportunity to even question, that can cause harm as we try to live up to the expectations that we place upon ourselves, and the expectation that others place upon us.
What do YOU believe? What do YOU think? What do YOU know for sure as YOUR truth? Whatever it is, it is right for YOU.
Welcome to the Path of Self Awareness.
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